A Year of Mindfulness: 52 Weeks of Focus – Week 15
This week I encourage you to look at your life while holding the intention of emerging. Where are you holding back? Where are you trying too hard? Where does blossoming need to occur for you? What are you afraid of? It’s often fear – especially of the unknown – that keeps us stuck. Create space in your yoga practice. Blossom and emerge on the mat. Notice the stuck, stagnant areas within and allow the breath to create the opening.
Today I had to laugh. I knew I had not logged into my online fitness tracking software for a few weeks and I kept meaning to log in and get caught up. I’ve been listening to the podcast weekly, but when I finally logged in today and looked at my last entry, it was 2 months ago. Two months since I’ve been so frazzled and then sick that I couldn’t even find the time to log in and record a workout. I did do some kind of workout (strength training and walking for cardio) most weeks. But I didn’t write it down. And I’ve been recording my workouts in this software for several years. The software will only let you go back and enter workouts in the last two weeks—I understand that it is to keep you accountable and if you want to earn points, you have to log in on a regular basis—but it’s still annoying. All I can do is start again.
So, I feel that the only thing I’m emerging from this week is being sick and really behind. The trick is to learn how to get far enough ahead so that the next time things slow me down, I won’t be so very far behind. I’m a little worried, also. Last year I felt like I was in the process of emerging—I was trying new things and had a lot of time for independent projects. With the step-kids coming every other weekend again and soon to be here for the summer—am I going to lose all of my much-needed time to myself? I really think they should be here and look forward to it. But I’m also afraid to lose myself in taking care of them. Double-edged.