Long stretches behind and ahead of us—of road, of time

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A Year of Mindfulness: 52 Weeks of Focus – Week 22

Playfulness. Mindfulness Heather says, “I must reluctantly admit I’m more serious than playful – and I SO wish that weren’t the case. I envy those who are light, airy and carefree. While I’m not dark and heavy, I do take many things in my life more seriously than necessary and can see great benefit in ‘lightening up.’ … So this week, join me in NOT TAKING THINGS SO SERIOUSLY. Find joy in play and playfulness. Live life to the fullest!”

Sounds like we’re made from the same mold. I also take myself too seriously, most of the time. I find it hard to relax, to enjoy the moment, to have fun without worrying about what is happening next, what I should be planning, or juggling. The kids are helping me with that. Sometimes they are just silly, and it’s contagious.

My youngest step-daughter likes to have contact—she’ll grab my hand, poke me, tickle me, or just hug me. I’m not naturally an exuberant, huggy person, but she’s persistent, and she wears me down. Which is a good thing.

If only I could get rid of worry and guilt, and just live. I’ve had small moments, precious glimpses. But never for long. A glimpse: Driving down a road in Scotland, having mastered the other side of the road in the rental car, good friend in tow, long stretches behind and ahead of us—of road, of time. Exploring, no firm plans. New love waiting for me back home. I was alive in that very moment.

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2 responses

  1. Oh how wonderful those moments are. I am with you and Heather on this – I’m also oh so serious and take my responsibilities heavily. So much so that it has drained the fun out of alot of years. However I am now learning how to have fun and play again. In control, almost, of my worrying too. How to stay steady and let go at the same time, that’s an art. Glad you are finding this joy with the children.

  2. I think sometimes that those of us who have lost mothers at a youngish age had to get serious very quickly. And that we’ve been fighting our way back ever since. Here’s to lightening up!