Remembering and missing my friend Deimos

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One year ago today I lost my friend Deimos. I’m reminded almost daily of his goofy, confident, noisy Presence.

I miss a herd of hounds rushing down the stairs to meet me at the door, Old Greybeard in the lead. I miss that he was so excited for walks or going anywhere in the car, that he wouldn’t stand still to hook up the lead. I miss having a buddy to say with strategic snout placement and that weird low greyhound woof, “Hey, you’ve worked enough, get off the computer!” I miss a not-so-secret 75 lbs of sneaking up onto the bed on chilly nights. Most of all I miss the individual soul that left such a gaping hole behind.

The story of Deimos:

Short night ahead with an injured hound

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Well, it’s going to be a short night. A few hours ago our greyhound Ruby was accidentally caught in the door to our latticed-in back porch {the used-to-be screen door has plastic lattice attached to it instead of screen}. As she was coming in, I came out the sliding glass door and Pip darted out, because she loves to be on the porch and find ways to escape into the back yard. My step-son saw Pip coming out and slammed the latticed door shut to keep her on the porch—but Ruby was half-way through it.

Ruby screamed and jumped back into the yard, stumbling. I thought she was just scared, because she’s the most skittish, sensitive soul I know, but I felt along her body for any injuries, just in case. I picked up all her feet, felt them, bent her legs, ran my hands along her torso. She seemed fine. It took 5 minutes or so to convince her to come back through the porch and into the house. She then went to lay down in her downstairs bed.

Later, I called her upstairs and she jumped on the bed. There were several of us hanging out in the room and going in and out, and I even sat down to read while waiting to check on dinner. Somewhere in there I went to give Ruby some love, and discovered a huge gash in the underside of her right thigh, right in the crease. It had hardly bled at all, but looked deep and was gaping open. Thankfully, my husband was able to locate supplies to clean the wound as I wrestled a very unhappy greyhound. We grabbed her loose plastic muzzle, which was nearby—I’d been using it lately to aid me in trimming her nails since she’s become increasingly cranky about that over the years {she’s 12}. Finally, we got her cleaned, wrapped, and stabilized and after a while we helped her lay down. Eventually, she calmed down enough to get a little sleep. But she’s obviously very uncomfortable. She’s going to have to wear the track muzzle all night, because we can’t risk her waking up and messing with the bandages.

Poor sweet thing. I’m not looking forward to getting up at 8a to call the vet to see if they can squeeze her in—she’s probably going to need a bunch of stitches. And I’m not sure how we’re going to get her downstairs.

Greyhounds have such thin skin! Our other greyhound, Deimos, injured himself on multiple occasions resulting in large open wounds. They always looked terrible but eventually healed up just fine with good care on our end, without stitches. This one might be tricky though, because of the location. I sure hope our favorite vet friend is in tomorrow.

Warm blue skies, but it feels like February

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Still feeling a little blue today. Buried myself in an overly-long hardly-took-any-breaks to eat or pee workday, testing out some 3rd party software to hopefully come up with a solution for my client. One of the problems of working out of a home office is that sometimes I just keep trying and tweaking and trying something else and tweaking—and then it’s 8 or 9p. In fact, I was still messing with stuff a little while ago. Not really productive, because I’ll probably wake up in the morning with a fresh idea and figure it out in way less time.

Part of my blue-ness is  feeling anxious about a work-related decision I’ve been putting off. Do I volunteer to do something that would be a good opportunity and possibly a good way to build my confidence back up, but is risky because it’s associated with something I failed miserably at a few months ago (so it would definitely raise my stress level 3-fold over the next week)? Or do I take it easy and not do it so that I can relax and do a good job on the other things I’ve committed to next week, but then risk regretting that I didn’t do it? Am I the only one who agonizes over decisions like this?

Another thing is being a little worried about my dogs—neither of them seem like they feel very good. Ruby just hasn’t seemed the same since we lost Deimos last year, and she has started to show her age. I’ve been missing Deimos a lot lately, especially since we’re coming up on the anniversary of his death.

Bummed that I spent all day indoors on one of the last nice days of the Fall. I should have at least gotten out there and taken Ruby for a walk.

Tomorrow.

Persnickety audio files and greyhound ghosts

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It’s Saturday and I shouldn’t be so exhausted. But I spent hours last night and a giant chunk of my Saturday wrestling with a persnickety audio file and finishing up the rest of next week’s show. These things happen. The great thing about working on a radio show by yourself is that you get to make all the decisions. The bad thing about working on a radio show by yourself is that you have to make all of the decisions. Good thing that my co-host and I don’t go out of town too often.

I came home and totally tuned out by cooking some simple pasta and watching several hours of Hulu. Haven’t done that for a long time: I’ve hardly watched any TV this summer.

And tonight, I have nothing else left for the blog. I’m going to go read, and sleep, perhaps dreaming of greyhounds. Deimos has been visiting me lately.

Sunday recap: butte, goodbye twins, banana french toast, the show, upcoming blogging events

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Sunday recap: Walked the butte for the last time this summer with the twins, made french toast with leftover and slightly undercooked “banana bread,” made sure the twins were packed and ready to go and said goodbye to them for the summer {boo!}, read a couple of sci-fi short stories, and worked on the show for 4 hours or so {laptop, back porch, with cats} during which the sky clouded over and grumbled quite a bit, but never lost its temper and started crashing things around.

(I also spent a few hours Saturday and Sunday at the station working on the show with my co-host, who is going out-of-town. I’m trying to get ahead because I need to finish the show up on my own and it’s due in a week—I think I’m in good shape, though, especially since I have time booked at the station tomorrow night.)

I’ve been thinking about what’s coming up this fall blogging-wise: Vegan MoFo (Word is, it will be October, but I don’t see an update on the website yet), NaNoWriMo, Reverb. Wondering if I’ll have time to do both NaNoWriMo and the radio show? NaNoWriMo (plus blogging every day, kick-started by NaBloPoMo) was really cathartic last year, especially since we lost Deimos that month, so I hope to do it again.

I’m going to attempt early bedtimes this week, since work is going to be just as bad this week as last, with early morning meetings, long days, and high expectations. So, good night.